Ever feel like everyone else at the party is at ease, and you are the only anxious one? Or do you ever scroll through social media and think that you are the only one having a shitty day or year? Does it seem like everyone in class or at work “gets it” without the struggle […]
Perfectionists often believe that the only way they are going to motivate themselves to keep succeeding at a high rate is to be hard on themselves. I can’t tell you how many perfectionists tell me that they secretly believe — they know — that if they stopped being cruel slave-drivers towards themselves they would instantly […]
It’s January 22. By now, 30 percent of New Year’s resolutions have been “broken.” I put broken in quotes because slip-ups, mistakes, moments of overindulgence or forgetfulness do not mean your goal is now broken and you have to give up or start over. Setbacks or bumps do not mark the end of the road, […]
Are you making pledges or promises to yourself this year? How did it go last year? There are a lot of tips out there for how to keep your resolutions, but I am more interested in what happens when you don’t achieve your goal….or when you have a setback, make a mistake, slip up. Do […]
Here’s how it works. You have a big and important thing coming up… maybe it’s a project due at work, maybe an event you’re hosting, whatever. So you worry, you stress, you over-prepare, you criticize yourself for not working hard enough and not being good enough. And then…you succeed, usually knock it out of the […]
Would you rather spend 6-15 minutes alone with your thoughts, or give yourself an electric shock? Would you be surprised to learn that 67% of men and 25% of women chose the shock? Check out this recent study to learn more about the anxiety that comes up when we try to shift gears out of […]
It seems unreasonably hard to put your phone away sometimes. Any free moment you have you get this itch to check it. And, even more problematically, you get the itch even when you’re not free. When you are with friends at a perfectly enjoyable lunch you want to check for texts. When you are on […]
Look, I get it. Trust me I do. It’s easier to text. You don’t have to catch someone at the exact right moment they are free. You have time to compose your thoughts, to phrase and rephrase. If you’re sending a message that gives news the other person doesn’t want to hear, there’s this comforting […]